As a casual purveyor of youth culture, I recently became aware of the allegations leveled against the right-wing influencer Candace Owens. Some have accused her of concocting a bogus conspiracy involving Turning Point USA, the president of France, the alleged first “lady” of France, the French Foreign Legion, and a multinational assassination squad that includes at least one Jew.
According to Owens, the details of the plot were relayed to her by a “high-ranking employee of the French government” who verified their identity with “concrete proof.” She deemed the information “credible enough” to broadcast in a viral social media post before informing the White House and U.S. law enforcement agencies, who may or may not be involved in the plot.
That all sounds pretty straightforward. Meanwhile, the people accusing Owens of lying have yet to produce any concrete proof of their own, just as the French government has failed to produce substantive evidence to verify the first couple’s claim that Brigitte Macron was born a female human woman.
I’m not interested in picking sides here. Like I said, I’m no expert when it comes to using the internet to make money as a political commentator and the middle school drama that often unfolds amongst competing practitioners.
I am, however, well acquainted with the inner workings of multinational assassination squads operating at the behest of foreign heads of state. I have served in their ranks, plotted amongst them, and engaged in tactical kinetic action on a global scale. I have tidied their mishaps before taking my leave on the periphery of human existence—to dance with demons of the physical realm, the psychological abyss, and the sexual underworld.
If Owens is telling the truth, and this nefarious plot is real, the people orchestrating it are people I would know. So I shook some bushes, asked some questions, and connected some dots. I utilized enhanced interrogation techniques on foreign nationals. I even reached out to the only honorable Frenchman I have ever known—a grizzled commandant who served with me in Bosnia. He joined our Bristol-Myers dark-ops detachment on a mission to capture an Albanian scientist on the verge of curing cancer. In other words, he is more than credible enough.
Here is what I’ve managed to ascertain.
Before the notorious pervert Jeffrey Epstein “killed himself” in 2019, his personal attorney contacted Robert F. Kennedy Jr. Epstein and his powerful clients wanted Kennedy to run for president in 2020 as an independent. He knew a talented young reporter who could help launch his campaign with a favorable profile. The goal was to siphon enough votes from Donald Trump to prevent his reelection. It was merely an insurance policy in case the primary strategy—using Chinese spyware financed by the Sinaloa drug cartel to manipulate Dominion voting machines and rig the election for Democrats—did not succeed.
To entice Kennedy to run, Epstein promised to provide video evidence that George Soros, Al Gore, and Anthony Fauci were personally involved in the creation of a deadly new virus set to be released in China later that year. Their aim was to shut down the global capitalist system and replace it with full communism, to save the planet through depopulation and a dramatic reduction in carbon emissions. If Kennedy ran and exposed the plot, he’d be a national hero. He might even win the election.
In return, Epstein made RFK promise to replace all the vaccines in America with a revolutionary elixir concocted at Epstein’s ranch in New Mexico. The slow-acting, DNA-infused serum would ensure that all females in the United States—and, eventually, the world—would become pregnant with Epstein’s child on their 16th birthday. The earliest version was tested on humans—men and women of all ages—back in 2006, less than a year before the Macrons got married. According to documents that have since been destroyed, these early tests were not successful and often produced horrible side effects. I have reviewed a photo confirming one of the early test subjects was a “Boris Trogneux,” who just happens to share a surname and birthdate with Emmanuel Macron’s alleged “wife.”
Again, I’m just telling you what I know.
Here’s where things get interesting. Visitor logs at the Metropolitan Correctional Center, where Epstein “committed suicide,” show that a prisoner on his block, [REDACTED], met with a “Boris T.” less than 48 hours before the jet-setting pervert was found dead. The prisoner in question, [REDACTED], was arrested in 2014 for stabbing the second cousin of a senior Turning Point USA official in Aurora, Colo. In the days and weeks following Epstein’s curious demise, residents of Oxford, Miss., reported seeing caravans of black SUVs unloading large bags of what appeared to be cash outside the home of Ole Miss athletic director Keith Carter. According to my contacts in the Slavic mercenary underworld, nearly all of the students who witnessed this activity have been conscripted into the Ukrainian military.
On Dec. 7, 2019, the 78th anniversary of the Japanese sneak attack on Pearl Harbor, Lane Kiffin announced he had accepted the head coaching position at Ole Miss. Kiffin abandoned his football team at Florida Atlantic University, which is just a 40-minute drive from Epstein’s infamous waterfront estate in Palm Beach. The announcement came exactly 119 days after Epstein’s death, a number that is otherwise unremarkable save for the fact that it becomes 911 (or 9/11?) when reversed.
Here’s where things get really interesting. Over the weekend, Kiffin left Ole Miss to become the head football coach at LSU…
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