‘Nightcaps’ is a daily column that catches you up on the biggest sports, news and culture stories you may have missed while pretending to do work at your desk. It runs Monday-Friday on OutKick.com.
It’s a beautiful day, Nightcaps family.
You know why? I’ll tell you. Because as of today, Tuesday, July 28 in the Year of our Lord 2026, all 32 NFL teams have reported to Training Camp.
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That means in just a couple short weeks (well, one week if you count the Hall of Fame Game), preseason football will be on our TV screens. And shortly afterward, college ball will consume our Saturdays. As God intended.
Not trying to wish away anyone’s summer — my colleagues Joe Kinsey and SeanJo would be very disappointed in me if I did that — but MAN. Call me Hank Jr. because I am ready for some football.
Speaking of summer, I’m still in Minocqua, Wisconsin, at my mother-in-law’s house. Nashville feels like the devil’s sweaty armpit this time of year, so it’s nice to get a little bit of cooler weather up here in the Northwoods.
Last week, we shot up to the Minnesota North Shore for some hiking. Goodness, it’s beautiful up there. And they have some great local breweries, too.
My dog is way too cool for his own good.
But you didn’t come here for my family photos. You came to find out what’s going on on the internet today. So let’s get to it, shall we?
Pop open a Fulton 300 IPA, chuck your work laptop into Lake Superior and let’s go.
An update on the wackos at Minocqua Brewing Company
Speaking of beer…
If you’ve been reading my Nightcaps for a while, you might remember me talking about the Minocqua Brewing Company. It’s “downtown” Minocqua (I’m using that term loosely) inside an old gas station from the 1930s.
Actually, a pretty cool little building. Perfect spot for a brewery. Shame the owner, Kirk Bangstad, is a certified nutcase.
Now, I pride myself in my ability to get along with people who don’t agree with me, but I assure you Kirk has no desire to get along with me. Or likely anyone reading this, for that matter.
He’s as far left as they come. There are signs plastered all over the outside of the joint that say “least popular place in town,” “drink MAGA tears” and “Antifa parking only.”
The beers are named things like “AOC IPA,” “The Resistance,” “Choice,” “Fascist Tears” and their Mexican lager, “It’ll Always Be the Gulf of Mexico to Me.” They also sell their own coffee and coffee stout, called “WOKE.”
To their credit, that’s actually a pretty clever name for coffee.
I digress. This guy isn’t insufferable because he’s a lib. I know lots of libs, and I like them just fine. He’s insufferable because he’s awful.
Kirk is always at war with the city and other local businesses, and he’s been charged with multiple legal offenses, including criminal defamation, harassment, bail jumping, disorderly conduct, and (last but not least) defrauding donors to his super PAC by funneling thousands of dollars to himself to pay for his legal fees. Last year he tried to hijack the 4th of July parade. I don’t have the time or patience to list his whole rap sheet.
But if it tells you anything, this dude is such a turd he even named one of his beers after his lawyer. It has the guy’s face on the can and everything.
Well, this week, his permit got pulled. Turns out, Kirk has been illegally transporting beer from Illinois without securing the proper permits or paying the appropriate taxes.
Not paying taxes! Imagine that.
The revocation is effective Aug. 4 — next Tuesday. Still, he has no intention of shutting down.
“They’ll have to pry me out of my taprooms before I stop selling beer to thirsty progressives who come to visit us,” he wrote, per the Milwaukee Journal Sentinel.
So I’ll be sure to walk by the brewery today and wave to ol’ Kirk before he likely gets hauled off by the authorities.
I’m sure his lawyer, Fred Melms (aka “Grateful Fred Red Ale”) will be on the case.
Bobsledder Desi Johnson gets in touch with nature
I’m not the only one escaping the hustle and bustle of the city. Desi Johnson — a Team Australia bobsledder who went viral during the Winter Olympics for being hot, as one does — got away on a nature retreat in rural Kyrgyzstan this week.
Gotta admit, Kyrgyzstan is not a country I’ve ever thought twice about. Or once, actually. But it looks beautiful.
I have no idea what the bobsledding season looks like. As far as I know, people only bobsled once every four years. But I’m sure there’s some sort of training or competitions involved in the interim.
Regardless, Desi seems to be keeping busy traveling, getting outdoors, running sprints and selling workout clothing.
Someone’s ready for French Alps 2030!
‘Shark Lady’ breaks record for most shark tattoos
Hold on, let me clarify: She has broken the world record for “most sharks tattooed on the body (female)” with 106.
I know what you’re thinking: Amber, does that mean some dude out there has 107 shark tattoos?
And the answer is no. Or if he does, he hasn’t come forward. I guess the folks over at the Guinness Book of World Records wanted to specify female body just to leave the door open for a man who wanted his own shot at glory.
I swear there is a Guinness World Record for everything. Somewhere out there, someone just broke the world record for “most Busch Lights (corn can) drank in a northern Illinois garage on an overcast Monday in July.”
And yes, I have one specific person in mind for that one.
SHARK WEEK HOST FORREST GALANTE EXPLAINS WHY CRUSHING BEERS IN THE OCEAN IS A BAD IDEA
True story, though, remember a couple of weeks ago when I was telling y’all about the mountain of dumb PR pitches that end up in my email inbox daily?
Case in point: I got an email from an organization (a movement? a nonprofit? a cult? I truly have no idea) called “World Clap Day” — proudly announcing that its founder, Andrea, completed 24 consecutive hours of live clapping, setting a new world record. That’s 149,216 claps!
I bet her hands hurt so bad.
You know, when I first read that email, I thought to myself, Why in the hell would these people think I would write about this? And here I am, writing about it.
Touché, clapping cult.
Wow, I really got in the weeds there. Back to the shark tattoo chick.
Her name is Emily Morrison, and she goes by “Shark Lady Emily” on social media.
A fitting moniker, to be sure.
And don’t you dare try to tell Emily to stop getting shark tattoos. Because you know what she has to say about that?
“I will not stop getting shark tattoos.”
If you’re really into this sort of thing, Emily will be featured on My Strange Addiction as part of Discovery’s “Shark Week.”
I’ve only watched that show one time, and it was an episode about a lady who can’t stop eating toilet paper. So when you look at it that way, Emily’s actually killing it.
Let’s open the mailbag.
📩 Email: [email protected] (Send your thoughts, stories, tips, rants and photos of your dog.)
🐦 Twitter/X: @TheAmberHarding
📸 Instagram: @amberharding
Dogs with mistaken identity
Fred H. writes: When it gets hot the cows go in the pond. One of these is not a cow.
Amber:
I don’t know what you’re talking about. That’s obviously just a very small cow. Who barks.
HYROX or DEKA?
Jon C. writes: Haven’t done a Hyrox race, yet. Had some friends do the one in Houston earlier this year and we were looking at doing the Nashville one together. Tickets might seem to be an issue.
However, if you want something very similar and more accessible, do a DekaFit race. It is a 5k with a workout station every 500m. So just like Hyrox except the workout stations are different. To me, Hyrox has more aerobic stations while Deka has more strength stations. I’ve done a few DekaFits and they are tough. For what it’s worth, Deka is an off shoot of Spartan Races, the trail running obstacle course race.
Amber:
For those who missed it, last week I explained that a friend of mine asked me to do a HYROX race with her. Apparently, it’s hella impossible to get tickets to compete in HYROX events, though — especially the upcoming Nashville race in December.
Everybody wants to come to Nashville.
So maybe we’ll look into DEKA instead. From what I’ve seen (and from how Jon described it), DEKA is more up my alley anyway. I’m more of a lifter than a runner.
But I still do the latter, begrudgingly.
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Dramatic readings of Luke Bryan lyrics
Caitlin R. writes: I mean, it sounds so artsy when you put it like this.
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Amber:
Next up, soft-spoken “Country Girl (Shake It for Me)” with finger snaps and bongo drums.
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